By the time one reaches the later chapters of life, the significance of moving on becomes more apparent. Life, with its unpredictable twists and inevitable losses, teaches a valuable lesson; holding on too tightly to the past can become a burden, while learning to let go is liberating. Therefore, the best axiom is to “move on and on”.
Weight of the Past:
When we are young, we often live with an “illusion of permanence”. Friendships, careers, possessions, and even our own health seem as though they will last forever. We invest heavily in people and situations, building attachments that feel unbreakable. However, as the years pass, life demonstrates its transient nature. Loved ones leave, some by choice, some by fate. Children grow up and build their own lives. Careers, once so central to our identity, retire us, and the busy hum of productivity is replaced by quiet hours of reflection.
We often see several people struggle under the weight of the past. Some dwell on old grudges, replaying conflicts in their minds as if doing so will somehow rewrite history. Others mistakenly live with illusion of for their youthful strength or the presence of loved ones long gone. Alas, life goes on despite all the joys and turbulences.
Moving on is not about forgetting; it is about learning to carry memories lightly, without letting them chain us to a moment that no longer exists.
The Art of Letting Go:
“Letting Go” is a skill that takes time and effort. It is a conscious effort to move forward in life without bothering about the past mistake or gloating over the past glories. They are all “experiences: good and bad” and all gone for ever. Moving on means making peace with life’s changing tides instead of resisting them.
It is a difficult thing to practice as past always hunts the people. Deliberate effort to move forward by forgetting them requires lots of mental strength and balance. Practices like mindfulness might help; bot at the end of the day it the mental will power of the elders that is crucial.
Healing Through Movement:
We see many people who struggle to move on from their losses, whether the passing of a spouse or the departure of children from the family home. Their pain is real and valid. But those who clung tightly to grief often grew more isolated and sorrowful. On the other hand, those who allow themselves to gradually release their pain seem lighter, more willing to embrace life again.
Gift of the Present:
As an elder, we become more aware of the preciousness of time. When we have fewer years ahead than behind, each moment becomes more valuable. Clinging to old regrets, failures, or losses wastes the limited time we have been left with.
We, as elders, should now choose to move on quickly from disappointments. When plans fall through, we should make new ones. When friendships fade, we should be open to new connections. When health deteriorates, we should focus on the activities we can still enjoy rather than mourning what is no longer possible.
Living this way brings us peace and enables us to enjoy the “current experiences” gracefully.
Embracing Change with Grace:
Change is often uncomfortable, but resisting it only causes suffering. Moving on requires acceptance. We that those who age with grace are the ones who allow themselves to evolve with life’s changes rather than fight against them. Letting go of old versions of oneself is part of the journey. The self we are today should be more accepting and patient than the self we were decades ago.
Living with an Open Heart:
Finally, moving on is an act of trust. It is trusting that life will continue to offer moments of joy and meaning, even after loss. It is believing that even when the future is uncertain, it still holds beauty.
As an elder, we should learn that the only “constant” in life is “change”. It is better to embrace it than to fear it. Moving on is not about forgetting the past; it is about keeping heart open for what is still to come. The principle of happy aging teaches us that life is a journey full of experiences: both “good” and “bad” and we have to undergo them whether we like or not. Therefore, it is always wise to be open to changes and move on as it comes in life.
This article is written by Dr A K Sen Gupta, Chief Trustee, My Retired Life Foundation (MRLF).
